Friday, December 07, 2012
What my child needs
Three days ago
On Tuesday night at about 11pm, KD asked me "Mommy, where is daddy?"
I replied him that daddy was working and he will be coming home later. If KD was not tired, he can wait for daddy to come home, but KD fell asleep and hubby got home after 12am.
The next day, KD woken by himself at 730am and first thing he said was "Mommy! Where did daddy go?" I replied him "Oh! Daddy should be having his breakfast in the kitchen now, you want to go look for him?" To which, of course KD wanted and off we went into the kitchen but to our surprise, Daddy had already left for work because he had got some stuffs to clear before he flies off to india in the same day afternoon for work too!
KD was a angry and little upset, so I had to call Daddy and allowed KD to talk to him. We then went to meet his daddy for lunch and came home together so that his daddy can collect his luggage before going off to the airport. The Daddy also took the initiative to bath KD himself before he left, as bonding time to make up for not being able to see him whole of yesterday.
Hubby is due to arrive singapore only tomorrow morning so KD will spend 4 nights without seeing his daddy.. And his daddy has been working late and traveling for work quite frequently too.
People always want to know, Why had i become a Stay At Home Mommy and Why Now only after my child turns three? I also received more negative reactions than positive ones.. Which made me ponder, why?
The above scenario is one of the reasons why I had to quit my job so I can spend more time with our child. A three years old is aware and able to understand, he also needs his parents to be around too.
How are we suppose to cope if his dad has to travel so often and the mother has to work and he is in child care? The mad rush to send him to child care then to work and then back home to fetch him again is really very draining for everyone. The child wants to be with his parents so why should we deprive him of that after giving birth to him? Both me and hubby feel the same, that's why we were such hands on parents! If we were to have children than pass them to grandparents or maids to look after, why bother to give birth in the first place? That's just us. :)
I can choose to forgo growing my savings, going for holidays, changing cars, buying bags etc.. Because both me and hubby feels that the growing child needs his parents to be around and since one of our work schedule has changed so drastically, one had to be around. If you ask me if this is a sacrifice i made? i wouldn't think so too. cos i gain a lot taking care of KD full time myself too. Yes, it's tedious.. it's more tiring than work.. i get judged all the time too and worst i don't get to spurge on myself anymore.. BUT the joy, satisfaction and bond are a lot stronger.. and hubby gets to concentrate on his work while i take care of home. No, I don't become useless just because i am not working. I think i am doing a great job now, regardless of what you think.. cos the person that is important and matters in this equation is me, KD and hubby and we three are totally happy with the arrangement now.
"I really like my life. I’ve arranged my life so that I can do what I want. " - Warren Buffett